LEADERSHIP NOTES: GATEKEEPING
Leadership Notes | Gatekeeping
Jealousy can dress itself up as discernment. Insecurity can call itself leadership. Control can insist it is “protecting” something.
That is how gatekeeping begins: someone decides who gets access, opportunity, or a voice based on whether that person makes them feel threatened.
Sometimes people describe this as narcissistic behavior or a Jezebel spirit. Whatever name you give it, watch the fruit. Does this person make room for others to grow, or do they need everyone’s path to run through them?
You do not have to fight for a place someone is determined to deny you. Keep your integrity. Keep developing your gifts. And remember: another person’s insecurity does not determine your worth or your calling.
Scripture gives us a way to examine this. James 3:14–16 warns that jealousy and selfish ambition produce disorder. In 3 John 9–10, Diotrephes loved being first, refused to welcome others, and tried to keep others from welcoming them too. His desire for position affected who was allowed in.
Gatekeeping can look like withholding information so someone cannot succeed. It can look like repeatedly passing over a capable person while giving every opportunity to yourself. It can sound like, “I’m just being careful,” when the real concern is losing influence. A decision may seem small on its own; the pattern and its fruit tell us more.
The Bible also shows another response. When Joshua worried that two men were prophesying outside the expected gathering, Moses did not treat their gifts as a threat. He wished that all the Lord’s people would receive the Spirit (Numbers 11:26–29). That is the posture of someone secure enough to celebrate what God is doing through others.
We should be careful with labels. “Narcissist” is not a diagnosis we can make from a disagreement, and “Jezebel” should not be a casual name for anyone whose actions hurt us. But we can name conduct, examine its fruit, and refuse to imitate it.
If you have authority, ask yourself: Am I helping others become fruitful, even when they may surpass me? If you are being shut out, seek wise counsel, address specific actions when appropriate, and keep your character intact. Someone else may control an invitation. They do not control what God can do with your life.
And you do not have to take revenge to see justice. Romans 12:19 says, “Vengeance is Mine, I will repay,” says the Lord. Leave repayment in His hands and remain faithful with what He has placed in yours.
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